I have been using NLP for over 10 years to help people think and feel differently about different aspects of their lives. Maybe you have searched online for a ‘NLP practitioner near me’. From experience, I can say clearly that Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) is a wonderful way to rethink and feel better about habits, behaviours, phobias, anxiety, or even create change around desires you have for certain things. NLP can be effective to remember memories in a different way, feeling more calm and relaxed by reducing anxiety and stress.
Explaining what an NLP practitioner near me does
An NLP practitioner near you will help you look at the layers of meaning that you give to aspects of your life. So, for some people, a dog is a loving best friend, but, if you do have a phobia, a dog might represent the fear of being attacked or other concerns around animals. Using NLP tools, you will get to the different layers of meaning and through becoming aware of them, able to change them.
NLP is frequently referred to as being a form of technology. Although the word technology makes one think of science and machinery, it really is, in a sense, a technology. An NLP practitioner will help you get clearer about what you want to achieve and how your mind, behaviours and thoughts go about doing that. NLP is also a technology in that it is vigorous, evidence-based and is really suited to each individual’s needs. In a sense, Neuro-linguistic programming is a way of enhancing the most important relationship in your life; the relationship you have with yourself. An NLP practitioner will have the skills to help you examine how you communicate with other people and with yourself. NLP will frequently involve taking models of the best way to do things.
What do the words ‘neuro’, ‘linguistic’, and ‘programming’ mean?
What is NLP? Neuro-linguistic programming has been around for only a couple of decades, but in many senses is really quite an ancient way of remembering and thinking about how we do things, communicate and think.
Neuro linguistic programming is:
Neuro: This refers to the nerves and the nervous system
Linguistic: Linguistics refers to how we use language.
Nero linguistic: So therefore neuro linguistics is a scientific area concerned with how the nervous system influences our language. And then how does language influence our nervous system in return.
Programming: Programming is simply how you carry out a planned sequence of actions to reach a desired goal or result.
When taken altogether, Neuro linguistic programming (NLP) is therefore how we use language in a systematic and predetermined fashion to achieve a planned result or outcome. Or rather, as often happens, how we don’t use our language very well and then get an outcome or result that we don’t need or want. NLP helps us look at how we, systematically, use language and behaviours. Do we use those mechanisms to actually achieve the results we are looking for or is our ‘programming’ ineffective or inefficient? A local NLP practitioner near you will help you change that around so that you actually get to the results and outcomes that you truly need and desire, in order to have the life you wish to have.
NLP is often referred to as ‘magic’. It is magic in the sense that NLP addresses aspects of ourselves that are often hidden and not seen to the naked eye. So NLP deals with the hidden layers within our behaviours and the hidden layers found in our language. For example, just consider your words. Consider words that you use and whether they’re helpful or not. Words we use can indicate how we view the world. So, for example, do you ever refer to yourself as ‘lazy’, or do you ever say that you have no time for anything? Are you ever tempted to blame other people, or do you use exaggerated phrases, such as when asked how your day was, you say, ‘Oh, my day was terrible’?
An NLP practitioner will help you notice the effects that these words have on you. When somebody refers to themselves as lazy, that’s in effect giving yourself a label. It’s going to be hard to really feel productive and confident about yourself when you keep giving yourself such a putdown by labelling yourself in a negative way.
When we look back on our day and say that the whole day has been terrible, that completely excludes and negates those many times when you actually smiled or felt good. What you’ve done is taken a big fat paintbrush with the word terrible on it and covered the whole day with the word ‘terrible’. Rather than seeing the day for being the ups and downs, happy and sad moments it truly was. Just from those examples, you can see that the way we talk has an effect on how we feel. An NLP practitioner will help you unpack those different ways that we talk and behave.
The way we behave is going to be based on thoughts that we have. So, for example, let’s consider the example of someone with a phobia. When it comes to a phobia, for example, a fear of a dog, we might base our thoughts and reactions on memories. These memories might be in connection with an experience with a dog or whatever the phobia is about. We create meanings around what a dog means to us based on our experience or attitudes we have accepted to be true.
Often an NLP practitioner will help you answer the questions:
‘How do you do that?’, in regards to any human activity.
‘How do you become successful?’
‘How do you ensure that people understand what you’re saying?’
How do you create influence?
How do you feel calm?
How do you feel relaxed?
The real power of NLP is that, through its ‘magic’, we can discover how to become influential with ourselves. Therefore, over time, we can cultivate positive relationships with ourselves by using NLP tools.
Often people think NLP is like a magic wand, creating change very quickly. An NLP practitioner may be found helping people succeed in business, helping leaders and managers understand how to communicate with workers and colleagues, how to manage relationships, how to maximize client satisfaction.
An NLP Practitioner will advise on how to use NLP to achieve your goals, to benefit your company, but also benefit yourself. Use NLP to answer questions such as, how do you manage upwards, how do you learn skills that ensure you work more efficiently?
Indeed many life coaches take NLP practitioner or master practitioner trainings. They will use those tools in a very effective way to, in a short period of time, deliver effective results and NLP offers tools to understand what we do and why we do it. Unlike many forms of psychotherapy or talking therapies, an NLP practitioner will ensure sessions are very goal orientated.
NLP is also about feeling more self compassion. In other words, you can learn to be less harsh on yourself since it’s a practical way of understanding why you do things and how to change.
An NLP practitioner will talk about how ‘the map is not the territory’
A metaphor often used in NLP is a map. Often you may hear an NLP practitioner talk about how ‘the map is not the territory’. In other words, there’s how relationships are, but then there’s also the map that we use in our heads to navigate those relationships. And that map often does not correspond to the territory. So, for example, just imagine if you went for a trip and you wanted to get from point A to point B. Yes you have a map. However the map really wasn’t very accurate. It had roads, intersections, showed one way systems, but also showed roads where there weren’t really any roads at all. It’s like navigating using an outdated Sat Nav.
It is hard to navigate when your map is inaccurate. We have to examine our maps of the world. Do they match reality? If our maps don’t match reality, then in many situations we will go the wrong way. For example we might think someone is being judgmental or critical, but actually we think that since our current map of the world interprets certain voice tones or words in that way. So changing that map is very crucial and important.
NLP can be applied to many different types of situations, both at home and at work. It can be used to help people navigate relationships and ensure their ‘map’ reflects reality as it truly is. As such, I would suggest that NLP is really great to simply have a better understanding of yourself too.
Working as an NLP practitioner and hypnotherapist
I often use NLP tools and techniques together with hypnotherapy. I find that when you take the magic of NLP and use it in a much deep and powerful way, using hypnotherapy, you can help people change their thoughts and behaviours in a much more powerful way too. For example, when I help people quit smoking or reduce anxiety or stress.
An NLP practitioner will be using a set of basic assumptions. I will complete this article by listing some of those key NLP assumptions. These are primary building blocks of NLP.
- One. People already have most of the resources that they need.
- Two. We are always communicating.
- Three. People are not defective. Rather they have some behaviours which may not be so useful in the given context.
- Four. Almost anything can be accomplished, if we break it down into small enough pieces.
- Five. There is no such thing as failure, only feedback on how to do things differently or better.
- Six. The meaning or usefulness of your communication is found in the response that you get back.
- Seven. As individuals, we respond to the internal map of reality that we have rather than to the reality itself. The map that we respond to is not the actual territory that we’re trying to navigate. So the map of the world on which we base our decisions, isn’t really completely or wholly accurate depicting the real world. It’s an approximation and based on our own assumptions, cultural and personal limiting beliefs and thoughts and conditioning. This often means that our behaviours and decisions are limited by that map. NLP helps you change that map.
- Eight. Every behaviour is indeed useful in a certain context.
- Nine. People will always make the best choice available to them.
- Ten. Our experience and how we remember things, will have a structure.
Most importantly, NLP teaches us the following ideas and it’s useful to even repeat these out loud or write these down as a mantra:
- You have not failed.
- You are not being judged.
- You are not defective.
- You are not broken.
If you’re interested to hear more about NLP and my NLP practitioner services, get in touch today.