I know that I’ve said it and maybe you have too? “I’m totally addicted to haribo” or “I’m totally addicted to dairy milk”.
As a weight loss coach, I hear clients often talk about their feeling out of control or compulsion to eat certain foods.

However I have a couple of fairly serious and very important questions to ask about this topic. I ask them not to provide a solution but simply to put the issue out there as something to think about.

Is there such a thing as being addicted to food?

The real importance of this question is of course about deciding how to treat and overcome overeating and compulsive eating patterns. Related also, is the question of which is the best way to cut down on eating in order to lose weight. Speaking as a weight loss coach, knowing what works best to help my clients is obviously essential.

Overeaters Anonymous does indeed work for many. However it is modeled on the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. My question right now is not whether OA works per say, but whether, in reality, one can in fact become addicted to food like one can be addicted to alcohol? Is it useful to view overeating as an addiction? Or in other words, when you say “I’m totally addicted to chocolate”, are you saying the same thing as someone who says they have a drug, alcohol or nicotine addiction? Hum, worth thinking about, hey!

If you are indeed a food addict, would this therefore mean that you are vulnerable to certain foods, normally sugars and starch, perhaps biologically and would perhaps then never ever actually be totally cured? If someone would indeed be a food addict, s/he would be able to say that they have not eaten that food for an amount of time, but following this, would add that they are still technically addicted to that food. Is that how we really relate to food?

There may be shared characteristics between overeating and addiction. However shared characteristics do not automatically mean the two are actually the same animal. Yes, in both a person craves, feels a loss of control, may be secretive about it, be preoccupied by thoughts of the substance and persist in the behavior despite its adverse effects.

However, as pointed out by Dr. Christopher Fairburn in his classic book on binge eating, there are striking differences. Overeating will often come in response to dieting and is normally actually a response to a desire to restrict one’s eating. The distress felt by my weight loss clients is often due to overeating being seen by them as a failure to control their eating. However it still results from an ultimate desire to control. Overeating can come out of trying to controlling one’s weight by dieting or in more extreme cases vomiting or using laxatives. Let’s compare that to an alcoholic. Does an alcoholic have an inherent desire to avoid alcohol, to control his alcohol consumption and control his/her drinking in the first place? Normally an alcoholic does not drink in order to control, it is rather the lack of control which is lacking. On the other hand, an overeater actually wishes to avoid food, their compulsive eating often results from a strong desire to control their eating.

A dieter or overeater also often has a real fear of gaining weight and fatness. All too often self worth can become measured in terms of shape and weight. Again let’s compare that to our alcoholic. The alcoholic normally does not fear getting drunk and the alcoholic is not normally vulnerable to abusing substances or drinking too much because they actually really wish to avoid drinking. An overeater often eats because they fear weight gain, an alcoholic doesn’t normally drink out of a fear of what being drunk will cause.

Does it benefit us to view overeating as an addiction? With no clear evidence that you can be addicted to any particular food, be that sugar or anything else, perhaps we should rather think about what is driving that compulsion to eat and sort that out. If overeating comes from focusing on weight, dieting, body image and a desire to lose weight, let’s instead consider our relationship with food and how our habits, thoughts, beliefs, self image and self esteem affect our choices around eating, food and lifestyle.

Let’s get very practical about eating at night and also overeating in general.

As I mentioned, I am now back living in London. So, if you need to find a weight loss coach, London has a new practitioner for you to gain from. I love helping clients with comfort eating, eating at night and overcoming overeating, so why not have a free consultation?

Let’s start with eating at night. Let me ask you to think back to a time, recently, when you ate at night in a way in which you were unhappy. Maybe you were full up and didn’t feel you needed the food? Maybe you overate on something unhealthy?

Whatever it was, just note it down now. It is of course very important to feel relaxed and not beat yourself up about it. We all have the odd lapse. It was just a lapse, and not a big deal.
Next please think back to the moment before you ate. Ask yourself, what was it that you wanted to FEEL at that moment? Was it relaxation after a long day? Was it a feeling of companionship in the absence of having a friend or loved one with you? Just think about what you wanted to feel just before you reached for that food.

Okay, now think about how, instead of eating, you could have that positive feeling in your life, during an average week? For example, if you ate to help you feel rewarded after a long day, where else could you easily find that feeling of being rewarded? Maybe you could reward yourself with a long hot bath or reward yourself by taking a few hours off to do something nice?

This isn’t simply the case of substituting something for food. The idea is that you were eating in order to get something positive for yourself, be it love, friendship, relaxation, a reward etc. So, just consider where else in your life you can find that positive benefit you were looking to get from food. If you know that you have already rewarded yourself that day or that you will, for example, be getting a massage as a reward later, would the food in front of you still have the same meaning for you? Maybe now the food has lost a little bit of meaning, since what you were using it for is now achieved in a different, more fun and healthy way!

If however you do still feel a pull towards the food, just ask yourself again about what you were trying to positively get for yourself from eating at that time? Then once again consider where and how you can have that good feeling or meaning without getting it from food which ultimately will hold you back from feeling slim and healthy!

Jason Demant – Weight loss coach, London. Overeating, London, help with weight loss, London

If you aren’t really hungry, just ask yourself, what might be holding you back from resisting those cookies, cakes or whatever your favorite guilty pleasure might be?

I would like to suggest that before you begin to look at the food itself, we need to focus and look at you and think about what are the normal, common ways we all, at times, stop ourselves from eating in a balanced way.

I help clients with weight loss in London. Over eating is not just in London of course, but busy cities like London can mean lots of very busy people giving themselves less time for eating healthy food, exercise and fun recreation. In terms of weight loss, London is like any other place and we all have unconscious ways that hold us back. What are yours?

To make breakthroughs with food, I would suggest that there are several ways we unconsciously hold ourselves back from making a big change. Here are just two:

1. Making it feel harder than it really is

Do you ever think that losing weight is simply too hard to do? Do you feel that it is simply too hard to stop eating at night? That it’s too hard to move your body more? It’ s all too much?

The process of how this happens is pretty simple when you think about it. We make up our minds about something and then automatically visualize everything else in our life inline with that thought pattern. For example, you might dislike going to the gym and so in your mind you now paint a grey, dull unattractive yucky picture of doing any exercise whatsoever. Now you say that it is simply too hard to exercise. However you do like walking in nature and the occasional swim, right? So, don’t allow your thinking to trick you. Also is it true that it is simply impossible 100% to stop eating at night? Do you eat every single night without missing one? Have you always, since birth eaten every night?

Question your thoughts and be more flexible in your thinking. In my London weight loss practice, I help clients review and reconsider unhelpful thoughts which hold them back from a slimming breakthrough.

2. Fear

What will life be like when I lose the weight? Will I have to give up my favorite foods? What will people say? What if I can’t lose the weight? What if I can’t keep up with my new exercise regime?

What are your fears? Getting slim is actually about feeling wonderful, light and refreshed. There will be changes but you will feel great feelings of excitement and inspiration with new doors and opportunities opening up for you. I would be scared to live life without making those changes!

It is normal to have fears. Fears are there to prevent harm and keep you safe. Don’t let them hold you back unnecessarily. Fears can be tricky to shed for good and you may need some help here. As a starter, I would suggest that you take your fears one by one and decide if each is sensible and rational and real. For example, you might fear that your new exercise class won’t last long? Obviously if you have decided to jog daily but in reality don’t actually enjoy running every day, then perhaps you might consider choosing something more realistic.

Move your focus onto how wonderful you will feel when you are putting your health and well being as your top priority. Fears are there when we are about to do something important, but don’t allow them to hold you back! Consider if they have a real message for you. If they don’t, then focus on how great you will feel when you reach your goals.

If you would like to start your journey to a slimmer more confident you, get in touch today. In terms of losing weight, London is a world center and I am excited to now offer my coaching services to you. I will help you cut down on eating late at night and help you lose weight. Wouldn’t it be great to feel confident, inspired and healthy again? Get in touch today.

At the beginning of January, it is always common to make New Year’s resolutions. It is of course less common to actually keep them. On New Year’s Eve, quitting smoking, quitting the job, traveling to Mexico or Thailand, all sounded like so much fun, right?

Okay, so what exactly are resolutions anyway? Well, obviously my first move was to put ‘resolution’ into Google. Immediately I got the following definition, “A firm decision to do or not to do something.”

So, why do we rarely keep to all our resolutions?

I would suggest that it’s actually for one of two reasons, both found in that Google definition. Either the decision wasn’t ‘firm’ or actually we didn’t really truly ‘decide’ to do it in the first place.

Since I’m in the eating and weight loss world, let’s imagine you decided that dieting or losing weight is to be your resolution. So, ask yourself, is your resolution a real, firm decision or are you just articulating a dream that you would perhaps like to happen. However, if you are honest, you really can’t actually see yourself doing it in reality or actually really want to make the necessary changes to truly make happen. Can you really be bothered?

I personally would love to sail around the world and would love also to take up surfing, but if I’m honest, I don’t really actually want to do either of these right now. So my new year’s resolution to take up surfing this year was a statement of fantasy rather than a real decision.

However I might really truly want to lose 5 kg or cut back on my emotional eating. This is something I really want to happen and a clear decision. However is my decision also firm? What’s holding me back from really making that decision a firm decision? Maybe I want it but can’t quite believe that once the weight is off, it will stay off. Maybe I am concerned that the whole process, though doable, will feel restrictive and too oppressive? All these arguments make the decision a little less ‘firm’, reducing that good positive energy we feel about reaching our chosen outcome.

Okay – it’s now your turn to do some work.

Please make a list of 5 accomplishments or goals for the next 3-6 months. Now by each put a tick, but only if you really do truly want to make it happen. Ask yourself, would you get up at 5am to go do it, or pay money to make it happen?

Great – if that was a firm tick, now ask if you are firm in your decision? Do this by asking yourself what might hold you back from going for it? Ask yourself if these are truly obstacles or just limiting fears, which with some effort, can be conquered?

How can you help ensure you reach your goals?

Here are a couple of ideas to try. How about listing the benefits that reaching your goal will give you? Also try telling lots of people about your goal, since this will help increase accountability and also increase your motivation. Close your eyes and imagine how you will feel once you have reached that goal and done it. Wouldn’t it be great to have that feeling in reality? Also make a plan of the steps you need to take in order to get there.

Good Luck and a successful 2012

Dear Jason

I want to share with you a success and ask a quick question.

Over the weekend I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep, so decided to clear up our messy kitchen. Someone had given us a delicious looking cake but I was not so tempted as usual to binge on it, which was great. I did some cleaning and then decided I wanted a cup of tea and it would be nice to have a piece of cake with it. I was really worried I would end up having too much of it, but thanks to your help, something came over me- I was in control and I ate it slowly and thoroughly enjoyed it. The next day I didn’t have any more. I am though worried that I won’t manage to keep control next time. How can I ensure I do well next time? (Gaby. Jerusalem)

Hi Gaby

Firstly, well done on keeping control! Good job. Since you used to find it hard to control your eating, holding back now is an incredible success and you should feel great about this. Also well done on eating slowly – eating consciously, a technique you discovered with me. This you should do no matter what it is you are eating. A key to success the next time is to actually not worry now about it! Worrying will raise your stress levels…

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Goals are all important, especially if you want success.

What are the benefits of having goals?

Goals give you direction and will also work to increase your motivation. Another great advantage of working towards  a goal is that you can also always ‘check-in’ with your goals. Meaning that you can easily see if you are moving closer to them or not. Without a clear goal, how can you know if you are really making progress?

So, let’s now think of some goals. I would like you to just think about something you would really like to achieve within the next couple of months. I like to use ninety days as a good time frame. Maybe this goal is within your career, relationships or something like your weight or how much you workout.

You might also find that you need to break that big goal down into smaller pieces.

So, how do you know if your goal is well worded?

Good goals can be characterized by the SMART mnemonic. While there are plenty of variants, SMART(ER) usually stands for:

S Specific

M Measurable

A Attainable

R Realistic

T Time-bound

E Ethical

R Reward/Rewarding

Write out your goal and see if it fits!

Let’s use an example. Let’s say you decide that you goal is… “I want to be happy”

Is the goal SMART? Is it specific or measurable?

Being happy or a similar vague idea is not a great goal. Actually  if you think about it, that’s actually what you will perhaps get or feel when you actually do achieve your goals. So the question then is, what is it that you need to make you happy? What is a goal, that when you reach that, you will feel happy?

Your answer to this question will be different from mine. Whatever your answer may be… simply take that and form it into a goal. Check that it’s SMART. Then make a plan and go for it!

If your goal is losing weight and feeling in control around food, download my information-packed course. It’s fun and easy to follow:

http://www.eweightlossforwomen.net

Let me tell you about a client’s story. I was coaching a young lady, named Emma. Emma was a mother, a wife and a busy secretary in a local office. During one of our weekly sessions, Emma sheepishly admitted that earlier that week she had binged on some potato chips. We discussed what had happened and Emma, after some thought, explained that she had eaten the chips because she simply had no one to talk to. She had no one to share her feelings with. Of course, this sounds a little crazy. How would eating potato chips have helped solve that problem? However often when we lack something that we really need or perhaps when we feel empty in some way, we try to fill in that gap with food or something else which might be unhealthy.

Emma felt a gap in her life since her needs were not being met. In particular, her need to feel understood and listened to. Together, Emma and I came up with a plan to slowly ensure that she was getting her needs met. Emma started out by planning when she would see friends that coming week. She also planned some changes to improve relationships, moving them to where she would like them to be. With her needs being met in good, healthy ways Emma could stop using food to feel good.

Try this exercise:
Take a sheet of paper and make a list of your ‘needs. Then take a look and see which are not being met right now as you would like them to be. Then plan some easy to do activities this week to help move you closer to getting those needs met.

Good luck!

A major cause of unbalanced eating which leads to weight gain is, of course, stress. Dealing well with stress is one of my biggest weight loss tips of women, no matter what your background may be. Deal well with stress and losing weight will be easier for you.
Let me explain more by telling you about a day of stress which I had a few weeks ago. I suddenly found that I had an important decision to make. When we are faced with a new situation and are unsure of the best course, it is normal to feel a little overwhelmed on the one hand and perhaps a little frustrated on the other.

Perhaps you may, at sometime have also had a similar feeling? Daily life, be it work, relationships, health, or watching your weight, can all, at times, leave us feeling that we are at a loss to know what to do.

What is the solution? The answer sound obvious and simple, it’s having self observation. It’s ‘catching yourself in the act’ of feeling anxious, lost or frustrated, that’s the key.

We might feel frustrated, annoyed or anxious but at first we often don’t really allow ourselves to actually really notice this. Rather we carry on as usual but start acting impulsively, which might result in eating bad food in large quantities or eating compulsively. Alternatively we might try to avoid things by watching too much TV, sitting on sites like Facebook, or filling our time up with silly things to help us ‘ignore’ our feelings.

Here is a weight loss tip you can use right now.  Write down the decisions you need to make.

Then consider in a rational way, what to do. I often help clients with decision making.  It can be good to think through things with a friend or a good listener. After coming to a good decision, your stress levels will drop and you will actually feel really positive, having now made a really good decision.

Our feelings of frustration, though unpleasant, are actually a wakeup call, asking us to move to a new path.  Like any feeling of pain or discomfort, negative feelings may feel unpleasant but are really there to alert us to something, to get us moving. They are actually messages to which we should listen, not ignore. They point us to a positive change that needs to be made. Without them, you will never be prompted to make a decision. If you don’t act on these feelings, you will continue to feel anxious and in fact allow that anxiety to dictate what you do or do not do.

Negative feelings and anxiety can lead to binge eating and putting on weight. Observe your feelings and think about what positive decisions or change in thought they are directing you towards.

If you come home feeling annoyed by someone or something, see these feelings as a wakeup call to make a positive change. Never use them as an excuse to whine or moan. Yes, get it off your chest, but dwelling in negativity is not the way to move forward.

A good way to ensure you are taking a note and observing yourself is to keep a journal or diary. Allow yourself to take time alone for yourself in a café, a park or somewhere where you can be alone for a brief time. Go for a walk alone or speak to a good listener, you will benefit from someone else’s more objective point of view.

To cope better with stress, why not get in touch for a free consultation with me? Just send me an email to arrange your session. Alternatively, you can also listen right now to my audio weight loss course. This course is full of wonderful tips, tools and techniques to help you reduce stress and lose weight too.

Just go to -  http://eweightlossforwomen.net – download it today.
Good luck

Jason
P.S. – my course will give you lots of tips I normally only share with my private clients. Download it today.

Maybe you have joked around about eating too much of something, say chocolate, and said, “If you eat anymore, you’ll turn into a bar of chocolate”! I know I have said that occasionally.

I help clients bring their eating habits under control and lose weight and in particular to stop emotional eating. We eat emotionally when we eat to feel better, to feel happy or actually whenever one might eat to change our mood.

As I’m sure you know, balanced eating is not just about what you eat, it is also about thinking about how and why you eat. Why do you sometimes eat when stressed, bored, sad or feeling down?

In order to change your habits and change your weight, you must first change your mind AND your feelings!

So, stop right now and think and imagine for a moment that you already have your
eating under control and the desired body that you so desperately deserve to
have…

*How do you feel?

*What clothes are you wearing?

*How do you walk into a social situation?

*How do you TALK and carry yourself?

Positive thinking and knowing that you will make it, these all bring success nearer quicker.

Change your mind and change your feelings.

Are you saying nice things about your body and yourself?

Negative ‘self talk’ brings you down and will make success much harder to find. After all if you talk about failure all the time, you will encourage failure to hang around in your life. Talk positively and that good energy will cause positive things to come.

Shift how you feel by shifting what you say.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Give yourself a break! We sometimes talk to ourselves using words that hurt. It is surprising how often we are prepared to say insulting things to ourselves which we would never tolerate hearing from others.

A good start is to stop giving yourself a ‘putdown’ when you get something wrong. Rather think and try to say positive things, at least when you do something good, which you can be proud of.

I will guide you to doing this better – to look at your thinking and give you new ways to cut down on emotional eating, those times when you eat when you feel down, sad, bored, and lonely or at times when you are not hungry. Its easier than you might think.

If you want to get this area of your life under control, get in touch today. I offer a zero cost introductory session, which will already start you towards becoming the slimmer you with greater control around food.

Why not also take a look at my wonderful 6 part audio course – download it at:

http://eweightlossforwomen.net

Just consider – Do you ever crave something salty or sweet but you aren’t actually hungry?

More often than not, that hunger has absolutely nothing to do with the actual food that you are craving. We often want something to eat but if we are not actually hungry, then the desire at that moment may be for something else. We use food to fill in that gap!

Instead, this craving for that sweet brownie or bag of salty chips has everything to do with an emotional hunger within you.

When this happens, it is helpful to pause, ask yourself, “What am I really hungry for?”

Now, when you ask this, you must think BEYOND food.

If you throw food at these emotions, the emotions will still be there and so the pounds will get added as well.

Okay, so what should you do?

When that craving comes, stop and ask yourself, “What am I really hungry for?”

Maybe your answer will involve things like meaning, relaxation, control, companionship, love, purpose, freedom, escape. Just think what it might be for you.

Now, if you are happy with your answer (s) (and there may be more than one answer to this question), next take an action.

Simply think of something that will bring you more of that thing you were hungry for. If it was companionship for example, think of ways to increase companionship in your life. If it was relaxation, think of some fun and healthy ways stop and relax on a regular basis.

Make a plan to incorporate that need into your life. Add in some activities to your daily schedule during the next few days. These really don’t have to be big things and can take just a few minutes. The main thing is to choose something fun and enjoyable.

Good Luck!