At the beginning of January, it is always common to make New Year’s resolutions. It is of course less common to actually keep them. On New Year’s Eve, quitting smoking, quitting the job, traveling to Mexico or Thailand, all sounded like so much fun, right?

Okay, so what exactly are resolutions anyway? Well, obviously my first move was to put ‘resolution’ into Google. Immediately I got the following definition, “A firm decision to do or not to do something.”

So, why do we rarely keep to all our resolutions?

I would suggest that it’s actually for one of two reasons, both found in that Google definition. Either the decision wasn’t ‘firm’ or actually we didn’t really truly ‘decide’ to do it in the first place.

Since I’m in the eating and weight loss world, let’s imagine you decided that dieting or losing weight is to be your resolution. So, ask yourself, is your resolution a real, firm decision or are you just articulating a dream that you would perhaps like to happen. However, if you are honest, you really can’t actually see yourself doing it in reality or actually really want to make the necessary changes to truly make happen. Can you really be bothered?

I personally would love to sail around the world and would love also to take up surfing, but if I’m honest, I don’t really actually want to do either of these right now. So my new year’s resolution to take up surfing this year was a statement of fantasy rather than a real decision.

However I might really truly want to lose 5 kg or cut back on my emotional eating. This is something I really want to happen and a clear decision. However is my decision also firm? What’s holding me back from really making that decision a firm decision? Maybe I want it but can’t quite believe that once the weight is off, it will stay off. Maybe I am concerned that the whole process, though doable, will feel restrictive and too oppressive? All these arguments make the decision a little less ‘firm’, reducing that good positive energy we feel about reaching our chosen outcome.

Okay – it’s now your turn to do some work.

Please make a list of 5 accomplishments or goals for the next 3-6 months. Now by each put a tick, but only if you really do truly want to make it happen. Ask yourself, would you get up at 5am to go do it, or pay money to make it happen?

Great – if that was a firm tick, now ask if you are firm in your decision? Do this by asking yourself what might hold you back from going for it? Ask yourself if these are truly obstacles or just limiting fears, which with some effort, can be conquered?

How can you help ensure you reach your goals?

Here are a couple of ideas to try. How about listing the benefits that reaching your goal will give you? Also try telling lots of people about your goal, since this will help increase accountability and also increase your motivation. Close your eyes and imagine how you will feel once you have reached that goal and done it. Wouldn’t it be great to have that feeling in reality? Also make a plan of the steps you need to take in order to get there.

Good Luck and a successful 2012

For some weight loss help, why not send me an email?

Dear Jason

I want to share with you a success and ask a quick question.

Over the weekend I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep, so decided to clear up our messy kitchen. Someone had given us a delicious looking cake but I was not so tempted as usual to binge on it, which was great. I did some cleaning and then decided I wanted a cup of tea and it would be nice to have a piece of cake with it. I was really worried I would end up having too much of it, but thanks to your help, something came over me- I was in control and I ate it slowly and thoroughly enjoyed it. The next day I didn’t have any more. I am though worried that I won’t manage to keep control next time. How can I ensure I do well next time? (Gaby. Jerusalem)

Hi Gaby

Firstly, well done on keeping control! Good job. Since you used to find it hard to control your eating, holding back now is an incredible success and you should feel great about this. Also well done on eating slowly – eating consciously, a technique you discovered with me. This you should do no matter what it is you are eating. A key to success the next time is to actually not worry now about it! Worrying will raise your stress levels…

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This week I taught a class during which we discussed the idea of GOALS.

Goals are all important, especially if you want success.

What are the benefits of having goals?

Goals give you direction and will also work to increase your motivation. Another great advantage of working towards  a goal is that you can also always ‘check-in’ with your goals. Meaning that you can easily see if you are moving closer to them or not. Without a clear goal, how can you know if you are really making progress?

So, let’s now think of some goals. I would like you to just think about something you would really like to achieve within the next couple of months. I like to use ninety days as a good time frame. Maybe this goal is within your career, relationships or something like your weight or how much you workout.

You might also find that you need to break that big goal down into smaller pieces.

So, how do you know if your goal is well worded?

Good goals can be characterized by the SMART mnemonic. While there are plenty of variants, SMART(ER) usually stands for:

S Specific

M Measurable

A Attainable

R Realistic

T Time-bound

E Ethical

R Reward/Rewarding

Write out your goal and see if it fits!

Let’s use an example. Let’s say you decide that you goal is… “I want to be happy”

Is the goal SMART? Is it specific or measurable?

Being happy or a similar vague idea is not a great goal. Actually  if you think about it, that’s actually what you will perhaps get or feel when you actually do achieve your goals. So the question then is, what is it that you need to make you happy? What is a goal, that when you reach that, you will feel happy?

Your answer to this question will be different from mine. Whatever your answer may be… simply take that and form it into a goal. Check that it’s SMART. Then make a plan and go for it!

If your goal is losing weight and feeling in control around food, download my information-packed course. It’s fun and easy to follow:

http://www.eweightlossforwomen.net

Eating healthy food, drinking enough water and getting enough sleep are all essential for feeling good and leading a productive life. We all have needs. These needs range from basic food and shelter to feeling fulfilled at work and also loved and cared for at home.

Let me tell you about a client’s story. I was coaching a young lady, named Emma. Emma was a mother, a wife and a busy secretary in a local office. During one of our weekly sessions, Emma sheepishly admitted that earlier that week she had binged on some potato chips. We discussed what had happened and Emma, after some thought, explained that she had eaten the chips because she simply had no one to talk to. She had no one to share her feelings with. Of course, this sounds a little crazy. How would eating potato chips have helped solve that problem? However often when we lack something that we really need or perhaps when we feel empty in some way, we try to fill in that gap with food or something else which might be unhealthy.

Emma felt a gap in her life since her needs were not being met. In particular, her need to feel understood and listened to. Together, Emma and I came up with a plan to slowly ensure that she was getting her needs met. Emma started out by planning when she would see friends that coming week. She also planned some changes to improve relationships, moving them to where she would like them to be. With her needs being met in good, healthy ways Emma could stop using food to feel good.

Try this exercise:
Take a sheet of paper and make a list of your ‘needs. Then take a look and see which are not being met right now as you would like them to be. Then plan some easy to do activities this week to help move you closer to getting those needs met.

Good luck!

I help clients overcome barriers to losing weight. These are bad habits, fears and unhelpful thought patterns which often lead
to eating late at night or when feeling sad, bored or lonely. When are times that you eat in an unbalanced way or when not actually hungry?

A major cause of unbalanced eating which leads to weight gain is, of course, stress. Dealing well with stress is one of my biggest weight loss tips of women, no matter what your background may be. Deal well with stress and losing weight will be easier for you.
Let me explain more by telling you about a day of stress which I had a few weeks ago. I suddenly found that I had an important decision to make. When we are faced with a new situation and are unsure of the best course, it is normal to feel a little overwhelmed on the one hand and perhaps a little frustrated on the other.

Perhaps you may, at sometime have also had a similar feeling? Daily life, be it work, relationships, health, or watching your weight, can all, at times, leave us feeling that we are at a loss to know what to do.

What is the solution? The answer sound obvious and simple, it’s having self observation. It’s ‘catching yourself in the act’ of feeling anxious, lost or frustrated, that’s the key.

We might feel frustrated, annoyed or anxious but at first we often don’t really allow ourselves to actually really notice this. Rather we carry on as usual but start acting impulsively, which might result in eating bad food in large quantities or eating compulsively. Alternatively we might try to avoid things by watching too much TV, sitting on sites like Facebook, or filling our time up with silly things to help us ‘ignore’ our feelings.

Here is a weight loss tip you can use right now.  Write down the decisions you need to make.

Then consider in a rational way, what to do. I often help clients with decision making.  It can be good to think through things with a friend or a good listener. After coming to a good decision, your stress levels will drop and you will actually feel really positive, having now made a really good decision.

Our feelings of frustration, though unpleasant, are actually a wakeup call, asking us to move to a new path.  Like any feeling of pain or discomfort, negative feelings may feel unpleasant but are really there to alert us to something, to get us moving. They are actually messages to which we should listen, not ignore. They point us to a positive change that needs to be made. Without them, you will never be prompted to make a decision. If you don’t act on these feelings, you will continue to feel anxious and in fact allow that anxiety to dictate what you do or do not do.

Negative feelings and anxiety can lead to binge eating and putting on weight. Observe your feelings and think about what positive decisions or change in thought they are directing you towards.

If you come home feeling annoyed by someone or something, see these feelings as a wakeup call to make a positive change. Never use them as an excuse to whine or moan. Yes, get it off your chest, but dwelling in negativity is not the way to move forward.

A good way to ensure you are taking a note and observing yourself is to keep a journal or diary. Allow yourself to take time alone for yourself in a café, a park or somewhere where you can be alone for a brief time. Go for a walk alone or speak to a good listener, you will benefit from someone else’s more objective point of view.

To cope better with stress, why not get in touch for a free consultation with me? Just send me an email to arrange your session. Alternatively, you can also listen right now to my audio weight loss course. This course is full of wonderful tips, tools and techniques to help you reduce stress and lose weight too.

Just go to -  http://eweightlossforwomen.net – download it today.
Good luck

Jason
P.S. – my course will give you lots of tips I normally only share with my private clients. Download it today.

Have you ever thought about that phrase, ‘you are what you eat’?

Maybe you have joked around about eating too much of something, say chocolate, and said, “If you eat anymore, you’ll turn into a bar of chocolate”! I know I have said that occasionally.

I help clients bring their eating habits under control and lose weight and in particular to stop emotional eating. We eat emotionally when we eat to feel better, to feel happy or actually whenever one might eat to change our mood.

As I’m sure you know, balanced eating is not just about what you eat, it is also about thinking about how and why you eat. Why do you sometimes eat when stressed, bored, sad or feeling down?

In order to change your habits and change your weight, you must first change your mind AND your feelings!

So, stop right now and think and imagine for a moment that you already have your
eating under control and the desired body that you so desperately deserve to
have…

*How do you feel?

*What clothes are you wearing?

*How do you walk into a social situation?

*How do you TALK and carry yourself?

Positive thinking and knowing that you will make it, these all bring success nearer quicker.

Change your mind and change your feelings.

Are you saying nice things about your body and yourself?

Negative ‘self talk’ brings you down and will make success much harder to find. After all if you talk about failure all the time, you will encourage failure to hang around in your life. Talk positively and that good energy will cause positive things to come.

Shift how you feel by shifting what you say.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Give yourself a break! We sometimes talk to ourselves using words that hurt. It is surprising how often we are prepared to say insulting things to ourselves which we would never tolerate hearing from others.

A good start is to stop giving yourself a ‘putdown’ when you get something wrong. Rather think and try to say positive things, at least when you do something good, which you can be proud of.

I will guide you to doing this better – to look at your thinking and give you new ways to cut down on emotional eating, those times when you eat when you feel down, sad, bored, and lonely or at times when you are not hungry. Its easier than you might think.

If you want to get this area of your life under control, get in touch today. I offer a zero cost introductory session, which will already start you towards becoming the slimmer you with greater control around food.

Why not also take a look at my wonderful 6 part audio course – download it at:

http://eweightlossforwomen.net

Do you ever have a food craving? A time when you really want something to eat, but that craving isn’t really related to food?

Just consider – Do you ever crave something salty or sweet but you aren’t actually hungry?

More often than not, that hunger has absolutely nothing to do with the actual food that you are craving. We often want something to eat but if we are not actually hungry, then the desire at that moment may be for something else. We use food to fill in that gap!

Instead, this craving for that sweet brownie or bag of salty chips has everything to do with an emotional hunger within you.

When this happens, it is helpful to pause, ask yourself, “What am I really hungry for?”

Now, when you ask this, you must think BEYOND food.

If you throw food at these emotions, the emotions will still be there and so the pounds will get added as well.

Okay, so what should you do?

When that craving comes, stop and ask yourself, “What am I really hungry for?”

Maybe your answer will involve things like meaning, relaxation, control, companionship, love, purpose, freedom, escape. Just think what it might be for you.

Now, if you are happy with your answer (s) (and there may be more than one answer to this question), next take an action.

Simply think of something that will bring you more of that thing you were hungry for. If it was companionship for example, think of ways to increase companionship in your life. If it was relaxation, think of some fun and healthy ways stop and relax on a regular basis.

Make a plan to incorporate that need into your life. Add in some activities to your daily schedule during the next few days. These really don’t have to be big things and can take just a few minutes. The main thing is to choose something fun and enjoyable.

Good Luck!